“Excuse me, I think you dropped something,” said Ted Horn pretending to pick up a twenty-dollar bill from the floor and handing it to his customer. The young man appeared startled and confused. Desperate, cold and starving he had walked into the Dixie Diner in Tupelo, Mississippi knowing perfectly well he didn’t have a single penny in his pocket. “What…sorry…I don’t think that’s mine” replied the customer. After losing his job right before Christmas, he was living out of his old, broken-down Datsun. The young man didn’t have money to gas up the car and had not eaten for more than a week. He was so hungry and out of options, that he had just eaten a hamburger at the restaurant even though he had no means to pay for it.
The Dixie Diner was a tiny operation—Ted Horn was the owner, the chef, the server, and the janitor. He had known desperation and poverty himself and could recognize them from a mile away. His customer was clearly malnourished, with torn up clothes and a deep sadness in his eyes. He wasn’t going to ask him to pay for the burger, but he was not about to embarrass him either. So, he pretended to “find” a bill on the diner floor:
“Excuse me, I think you dropped something.”
Twenty dollars was a lot of money in 1971—the equivalent of $200 dollars in today’s currency. Ted probably couldn’t afford it, but felt the need to give it to the young man anyway. Embarrassed but relieved, the customer paid for the food, used the rest for gas, and drove his old Datsun all the way to Kansas City. There, he eventually found work, met the love of his life, and started a family.
It was Christmas-time when, yet again, he lost his job. He was now 27 years old with a little kid at home and just a few hundred dollars to his name. What was he going to do? How was he going to buy presents, pay the bills, put food on the table? Well, instead of looking for answers, he felt an inexplicable urge. He withdrew two hundred dollars from his account, broke them down into $20 bills and gave them away to people on the street who appeared to be in bigger trouble than him… “Excuse me, I think you dropped something.”
Something amazing happened.
His luck took a 180-degree turn. Suddenly, he didn’t have to look for work—great jobs just found him. He was talented and tireless, so his skills, acumen, and work-ethic helped him to become a respected businessman. Every one of his ventures and enterprises were successful and, before long, he amassed a five-million-dollar fortune.
But he didn’t forget how it all started, so every Christmas season he would walk the poorest neighborhoods of Kansas City, the bus stations, thrift stores and pawn shops, and hand out $100 bills to people who seemed to be in need. “Excuse me, I think you dropped something,” was his signature phrase now. Then he would put the bill in people’s hands and disappear before they could even thank him or ask for his name. Eventually, he started crisscrossing the country so he can expand his Holiday philanthropy for the impoverished citizens of New York, Chicago, Saint Louis, and many more. Teary-eyed people started calling the TV stations to thank their mysterious benefactor for saving their holiday.
One day, he traveled to Tupelo, Mississippi to visit the “Dixie Diner” again. “Excuse me, I think you dropped something,” he said to Ted Horn and put a massive envelope with thousands of dollars in the hands of the disbelieving owner.
His exploits became legendary, his fame spread, but he insisted on remaining anonymous. Oprah Winfrey interviewed him, but he appeared on the show in disguise. Since people didn’t know his name, the press started calling him Secret Santa. Yes, that’s right—he was the original Secret Santa—the man who started a holiday movement from right here in Kansas City that is now ubiquitous all over the world.
“Kindness is like a boomerang. Just send it out there and it will inevitably come back to you.”
Secret Santa
I wanted to tell you the story of Lena Foster, but my mind kept wandering back to the epic saga of the original Secret Santa. She has so much in common with him. Her inherent kindness, her nobility, her spirit of giving. You see, Lena likes to give. More than anything, she aspires to make other people happy. To see them smile. To make their day.
Lena can captivate you instantly with her intellect and sense of humor, but the one thing I remember most from our first encounter was her radiant, genuine smile. She is one of those rare people who can smile not just with her mouth, but with every fiber of her being. It’s an aura that’s irresistibly contagious and she knows it.
I don’t remember the exact date of our first meeting, but I have a feeling she does. Lena has a steel-trap of a memory. She has an otherworldly recall for phone numbers, dates, schedules, directions and so on. I asked her if she knew approximately when she joined GoodLife and she answered: “Of course – October 13th, 2013!”
It is very easy to like Lena…to be her friend. The reason for this, of course, is her unique and gregarious personality. Despite all the challenges in her own life, she just loves people and has never lost an ounce of her faith in humanity. The amount of hobbies Lena has is overwhelming, but her biggest one, undoubtedly, is making friends and she does it effortlessly wherever she goes. Now 48 years young, she has amassed an army of friends – they are in Mastin House in Overland Park where she first joined GoodLife, in the Neighborhood Network where she lived for two years, in the Douglas County Day Services, and of course in Overland House where she resides currently.
Sometimes, I marvel at her astonishingly active lifestyle and exuberance. If she’s supposed to have severely-limited mobility, how in the world is she always on the move? Lena depends on a wheelchair for going places and yet she never stops searching and discovering new attractions and experiences, whether it’s creating gorgeous art pieces at the day center, attending concerts, going to the movies, gardening, visiting Midnight Farm, shopping, enjoying nature, etc.
She is a cooking connoisseur, capable of crafting culinary masterpieces even with the most basic of ingredients. Her famous cheesecake and brownies have acquired a reputation of legendary proportions. Overland House now has a book of Lena recipes more valuable than Andy Reed’s playbook. Her home coach, Jill, and her DSP, Brigette, are convinced that Lena can start her own food business. Trust me, I’ve tried her brownies—these things are so delicious they should be illegal. Lena has her own cooking station and, while I was visiting, she made a taco salad that looked like an art installation.
Speaking of legendary, Lena’s intelligence, vocabulary and sense of humor are clearly extraordinary, and I believe a lot of it has to do with her love for books. She’s a voracious reader and has a particular proclivity for fantasy literature. When giving me a tour of her colorfully decorated bedroom she invited me in by saying: “Welcome to my boudoir!” Boudoir, indeed! She has not one, not two, not three, but FOUR closets with meticulously arranged and separated clothes!
Her sweet, exuberant personality was clearly at work in decorating the room. There was a happy stable of adorable stuffed animals and the signs on the wall read: “Hope”, “Faith”, “Love”.
Lena clearly has her own unique style that extends to her eclectic fashion statements. Her ever-growing collection of earrings is impressive, and her hair is always spectacularly braided and dressed in colorful arrangements by her cousin, Lisa.
Yes, Lena loves looking good on the outside but her personality, her core is what makes her even more beautiful.
“She is just so kind,” said Jill, “She loves shopping but then wants to give most of her stuff to other people. And she is extremely emotional and empathic.”
I find it meaningful that the activities Lena likes the most—cooking, shopping and gardening—have to do with making other people happy. She is satisfied with her dishes only when others enjoy them. She shops so she can give presents and nurtures flowers so people can experience the beauty of nature.
Basically, Lena is all about spreading goodwill and kindness. She cares deeply and loves her roommates, Amy and Annelise. She cherishes her relationship with Jill, Brigette, and all the other professionals at GoodLife and would do anything for her countless friends. There are people who hide their feelings. Lena is clearly not one of them. She’s not afraid to wear her heart on her sleeve…and sometimes on her arm. After noticing that I am looking at a beautiful rose tattoo on her forearm, Lena smiled: “I got it at ‘Skin Illustrations’ because I wanted something to remind me of my wonderful foster mom. Her name was Mary Rose. She passed away, but now I have her with me all the time.”
I met the original Secret Santa in 2006 after he decided to reveal his identity. On a rainy December afternoon, I ended up talking at length to him and his wonderful son.
His real name was Larry; Larry Stewart. The reason he decided to end decades of secrecy was both noble and devastating. Apparently, even Santa can get sick. Even Santa can get cancer. It had started in his esophagus and had slowly slithered its way into his liver. Larry was dying… But he knew he still had a job to do. He wanted others to carry his mission. To continue what he started.
“Kindness is like a boomerang”, he told me, “Just send it out there and it will inevitably come back to you. It is so much better to give than to receive! And it doesn’t have to always be money, you know. Sometimes a kind word, a gesture, or even a smile can lift a person up and make a huge difference.”
I found out a lot about him and his life. He grew up in rural Mississippi without parents and in extreme poverty. In a system stacked up against him, he managed to get a scholarship and graduate from college. He was always a hard worker but, like so many people, he struggled to make ends-meet and provide for his family; it was a never-ending struggle. Disappointment after disappointment. One misfortune after another. Until that fateful day when he made a decision to help others.
Larry Stewart passed away a few weeks after our meeting. But first, he managed once again to walk the streets of Kansas City on the last Christmas of his life and give away $200,000 of his money to the needy and downtrodden.
And in a way, he didn’t die. By shattering his alter ego, he let everyone know that Santa has a name. Not just Larry’s. His message was that Santa has your name, too. He believed that everyone has at least one Secret Santa deep within their heart, waiting to be awakened and sent out into the world. Larry’s singular idea is now a global movement and there are millions of ‘Secret Santas’ scattered around the world.
Lena Foster is one of them. Just like Larry, she believes in the good of people, in paying it forward, and in the value of random acts of kindness. This is just who she is, a constantly smiling, giving, helping, commiserating, cooking force of nature. And as I marvel at her UNLIMITED mobility, aura, and happiness, I can’t help but remember the words of Larry Stewart: “Kindness is like a boomerang. Just send it out there and it will inevitably come back to you.”
